A day in May

2025 marks 10 years since Ireland legalised same-sex marriage by popular vote. To celebrate the anniversary, Beatrice Fanucci collected stories from Outhouse and GCN’s YES+10 campaign, spotlighting a selection of the couples who have tied the knot since.

Feature Irish — Trans — Cinema

May 22, 2015, is a date etched in the memory of the LGBTQ+ community in Ireland. It is the day when Ireland became the first country in the world to legalise same-sex marriage by popular vote. People all over the nation came together to make marriage equality a reality for a minority who had been fighting for years to secure those rights. It means that members of that minority fought, campaigned, organised, made their collective voice heard and in the end, got what they wanted. 10 years on, there are still rights to be secured, families to be protected and members of our community who need us to continue fighting together. But what we’ve already gotten, we’re not giving back. And we deserve to celebrate.

The road to Marriage Equality in Ireland was paved by the courage and commitment of the activists and groups who came together to achieve one common goal. Launched by Gay and Lesbian Equality Network (GLEN), Marriage Equality and the Irish Council for Civil Liberties (ICCL), ‘Yes Equality’ was an umbrella campaign that saw organisations, local groups and thousands of individual volunteers all over the country unite to bring about change for LGBTQ+ couples. One novelty rarely seen in Irish referendums was that campaigners decided to carry out door-to-door canvassing, trying to influence people to vote ‘Yes’.

The result was a level of engagement and participation never seen before in a political campaign in the country. It was also Ireland’s most successful register-to-vote drive, with over 20,000 new voters enrolling in advance of the referendum. But, of course, the most important result was that over 1.2 million people turned up at the ballot on that day in May to vote in favour of same-sex marriage, securing a resounding, first-of-its-kind victory for the LGBTQ+ community in Ireland.

A big part of why the campaign was so successful, especially in the later stages, was the personal accounts from families and same-sex couples. The population responded to the stories that campaigners and volunteers were sharing, turning an abstract idea into a vote that could impact the lives of real people. These, and all the stories that were made possible by that vote, are what we want to celebrate here.

Marking 10 years since the Marriage Referendum, Outhouse LGBTQ+ Centre and GCN collaborated on an exhibition and social media campaign titled YES+10. As part of this project, queer couples living in Ireland shared the stories and memories of all the ‘Yeses’ that led them to marry the loves of their lives. From the moment they first received the news that the referendum had passed, their lives, like so many others, changed forever.

EJ & Em (Left)

THE FIRST ‘YES’

“The Marriage Referendum was our very first chance to vote, and it felt so surreal that we were using our first vote on such an important and personal issue,” EJ and Em said. “We were two anxious teenagers at the time and received the news standing in Em’s parents’ house. I was so emotional, I couldn’t believe it was real. We had already made plans between us of where we could go to get married if we couldn’t get married in Ireland.”

THE SECOND ‘YES’

“We met online in late 2013,” EJ said. “We shared a lot of interests in music, the same bands, and soon were talking nonstop.” She recalled, “Em’s family often joke that they knew she really liked me because they’d never seen her room so clean or her do her homework so much. We met just as we started to do the Leaving Cert.”

Painting a picture of their wedding, EJ said: “As I walked down the aisle to Em, I was followed by a bumble bee, which was pretty surreal since I was taking my wife’s surname, which derives from the word for Little Bee in Irish.

“It was so special to have our ‘day in May’ with the significance of that day in May 2015 that made it all possible. The speeches were also a memory that we’ll cherish forever. Lots of our friends and family had speeches directly from the heart, and it created a gorgeous atmosphere of support and love in the room.”

10 YEARS LATER

“I honestly can’t believe that it has been 10 years since marriage equality became a reality. We are so incredibly grateful to all those who fought so hard for this to be a reality,” EJ shared.

“One thing I will say, is we have come so far but still have so far to go. Now more than ever, we need to protect our trans brothers and sisters. We are not equal, until we are all equal and I wish all the peace and safety of legal protections that they deserve.”

Claire Ryan & Claire Griffin (Above)

THE FIRST ‘YES’

“I was a volunteer many years ago on The Limerick Lesbian Line and Rainbow Support Services, now GOSHH,” Claire R recalled. “So when campaigning began, I had to get involved. I campaigned for Marriage Equality in Limerick City. I was at the count centre at UL the morning after the referendum. About an hour and a half into the counting, I saw on social media that David Quinn had congratulated the Yes side on their victory.

“I rang Claire to tell her the result and came home a blubbering mess sometime later–the relief was insane!”

THE SECOND ‘YES’

The two Claires “met through mutual friends on a Christmas night out in 2013 and just hit it off immediately.”

Claire R recalled a couple of failed attempts at meeting up after that day, as Claire G was studying for exams. “I said to our dog Spud that I would try one more time, and if she said no, I wouldn’t ask again,” she shared. “Fortunately, we met one Sunday morning and went for a walk in Castleconnell with Spud and the rest is history.”

Speaking about the day of their wedding, they said it “was unbelievable from start to finish. It was full of love and fun and happiness shared with family and friends. We had Spud with us. It was so relaxed and light-hearted.

“While we were out by the river having photos taken, a boat passed and everyone on board started waving and cheering us. It was great. The whole day was great. The band had us dancing all night. My nephew called it ‘The Rock and Roll Wedding’.”

10 YEARS LATER

“I never in my life thought I would see marriage equality in Ireland. It’s such a human thing to want and it’s an important step in a serious relationship. I think human decency won out that day,” Claire said. Reflecting on the future ahead, she added, “Of course there is still progress that needs to be made. It’s disappointing that every little thing needs to be battled for, but we are battlers and we will battle on.”

Feature MarRef — Weddings — Love

Dan & Michael

THE FIRST ‘YES’

“Back in 2015, I was working in a hotel as a waiter while in college, and I think it was someone’s wedding,” said Dan, recalling the day of the referendum. “Can’t imagine they had the best service, as every chance we got, we were hiding and checking our phones for the result!” “I wasn’t fully out at the time, and definitely not at work, so all my campaigning was in the–probably not that convincing–guise of a very supportive ally.”

THE SECOND ‘YES’

“Such a romantic story, one for the ages!” Dan said. “We met on Tinder.”

“From the first date—coffee and a walk in the woods—it was just so easy. We spent several hours just talking as if we already knew each other. I was definitely eager to meet up again, and after a few dates, we made it official. Nine months later, we were engaged, and married 18 months after that.

“We were married in September 2024 in front of around 100 of our friends and family, at a woodland pier overlooking the sea, where we had our first date and where Michael proposed,” Dan recounted. “Standing up there with him in that place, saying our ‘I-dos’ and then looking out at the crowd of people who love and support us meant the world to me.”

10 YEARS LATER

“10 years ago, I struggled to have necessary conversations with family about why, even though it doesn’t affect them directly, or even though the church doesn’t agree, they should vote ‘Yes’. Nine years later those same family members showed up for me in complete support on my wedding day. Change is possible within short periods of time,” Dan said.

“Now more than ever, to be able to point at a piece of legislation to prove that our community and our allies are strong enough to make lasting change, means a lot. The LGBTQ+ community could not have done this alone, and our nation stood up to help us achieve equality.”

Shelly Hart & Jess Hart - The Harts

THE FIRST ‘YES’

Shelly and Jess weren’t together yet when the referendum passed, so they got the news separately. Jess recalled taking a detour through Bridie’s Bar when the result was announced, “which was very emotional because of the older individuals that were in there”. She also appeared on Vinnie B in the G later that same day.

Shelly was instead in Portlaoise, having “great celebrations” with a group of lesbians and her then partner.

THE SECOND ‘YES’

The road to that second ‘Yes’ was a long one for Shelly and Jess. “We have known each other for a very long time, nearly 30 years, since the age of about four,” they shared. “However, we didn’t realise there was an attraction until we ended up drunk at a P!nk gig in the RDS on a beautiful summer’s evening in June 2019, and subsequently had our first kiss in the smoking area of The George, much to everyone’s shock—Jess identified as straight up to then.”

They recalled their wedding, saying: “The day was so full of love and we made a point to recognise how lucky we felt to be able to get married, and how grateful we are to those before us who fought for our right to marry.”

The following is a quote from their ceremony:

“Jessica and Michelle have chosen the rainbow ribbon today which represents the LGBTQ+ community, they would like to acknowledge that it wasn’t too long ago, in 2015, that Ireland came together to vote ‘Yes’ on the right of couples of the same sex to marry and they feel very privileged to be getting married today, because as Justice Anthony Kennedy in the US said, ‘No union is more profound than marriage, for it embodies the highest ideals of love, fidelity, devotion, sacrifice, and family.’”

10 YEARS LATER

“Although there has been some progress since the vote in 2015, it has been slow,” Jess and Shelly shared. “All families are not protected by legislation yet so we still have some way to go. However grá is the law now and we are very privileged and proud to walk hand in hand on the streets of Ireland as wife and wife. We also look forward to starting our rainbow family.”